Climbing The Mountain Fuelled By Envy


Anchored To Comfort Zone

Although our natural tendency is inclined towards rest, taking holidays, staying within comfort zone, in order to grow and develop we can not stop, but have to keep changing, moving. We need to imagine our lives as a constant climb toward the peak of a high mountain.

Our inherently self-serving, self-justifying nature – that is only concerned about finding ever greater pleasure for ourselves and to keep us away from pain, suffering –  is only interested in establishing a balanced, peaceful state. Our nature is only concerned about finding the necessities, fulfilment for our own desires so it can relax.

We all dream about endless holidays, reclining on the beach, sipping fine drinks, watching the sunset. We all seemingly fantasise about earning enough money so we would never have to work again but can travel, eat, drink and live merrily. This is also what the brainwashing marketing, mass media is projecting towards people today.

At the same time we exist in a natural, evolutionary system that has a predetermined program with a very specific role, purpose for human beings in it. And while on one hand we imagine having free choice, determining our own pace of development, choosing our own purpose, this underlying, so far unknown program drives us towards a very different direction, towards our real, predetermined role in the system.


Human Purpose

As wise people, who already revealed and fulfilled that human purpose in reality inform us, we are not born in order to simply fulfil our physical necessities, satisfy our hormonal urges, desires. We are not here to simply secure our comfortable survival until we live in this world and then disappear. We are born into this world in order to research, reveal and understand the system of reality, attain its predetermined plan, identify the single creating, organising and governing force behind, it and justify its plan completely.

Research, revelation, understanding can only happen through reaching similarity of form with the researched. When one wants to hear a certain broadcast, capture a certain wavelength, frequency carrying a message, one needs a radio receiver tuned to the exact frequency that broadcast, message is carried on.


The Observer And The Observed

The “frequency”, wavelength reality, natural evolution’s plan is vibrating on is different from our own original human frequency. Human beings are inherently tuned to be completely self-centred, introverted and subjective. From the whole of reality we can only perceive, observe anything that belongs to our “inner sphere”, that concerns our immediate, direct survival, fulfilment of our own necessities.

The natural reality that surrounds us is tuned in an opposite manner. It is built on a selfless, altruistic, unconditionally serving, mutually complementing paradigm. Without such mutual altruism balance and homeostasis, that is crucial for life and optimal development wouldn’t be possible.

The force, source, frequency that created, organises and governs our natural reality is pure selfless, altruistic care and service towards anything “outside of the self”. In fact even this description is false since that force has no “self”, it is pure bestowal without any other description. It is like a unidirectional vector that has no “starting point”, it has nothing that points back towards its own direction.

This is a bit difficult for us to consider, imagine a force that has no “self”, origin, and in its essence it only exists for giving life and serving what is “outside of it”, since we ourselves “consist of” nothing else but a self. This force is like imagining electricity simply flowing without the need for a power station, or watching a waterfall cascading down endlessly for millions of years seemingly without an origin or an end.

We “ourselves” can’t exist without an origin, an anchor pointing to an observer, something we can associate our consciousness with. Without such anchor we would simply disappear, dissolve into that original force like a drop of water into a fast streaming river.


In Need Of Special Clothing

Thus this notion of serving things “outside of the self” only makes sense from our self-centred point of view. And this observer/observed duality in us is also what gives us the capability of researching reality outside of us, to recognise this live giving, creating force compared to something, in contrast, through comparative research.

Thus this actual revelation comes through a constant inner tension, inner war within this duality. On one hand we have our own self-serving, self-justifying egoistic core, constantly pointing back at itself, judging its own existence, giving us our own, subjective, egocentric reason, logic, point of view.

At the same time we need to acquire the necessary similarity, fine tuned, altruistic frequency giving us the ability to listen to the broadcast of the life giving, creating, natural source. We need to gain an altruistic, transparent, selfless, external special clothing over our harsh, ruthless, egoistic core, and then through the special clothing, screen, like through some “invisibility cloaking device” we can enter nature’s altruistic, quantum system to reveal and attain it. We can also compare it to cancer-like cells receiving a special cell-membrane helping them to mutually interconnect, thus forming a new, multi-cellular organism achieving a qualitatively higher level of existence.


True Love Detector

As mentioned above since our own reality is rooted in complete self-service, self-justification, calculating everything absolutely subjectively, we have difficulty even to imagine what selfless, altruistic service, true love of others means. If we try searching for the closest example from our human reality to describe that altruistic state the mother’s love towards her baby is the only one we can imagine.

Especially during pregnancy the mother’s body automatically, subconsciously, perfectly, in the most optimal manner serves, fulfils the baby inside her, without any selfish calculation caring for, developing the embryo. At that stage the mother’s own consciousness, conscious behaviour hardly influences the baby especially after the first 3 critical months. Even if the mother is starving or is sick, even is she has a bad mood, or even questions her own selfish need for the baby, the womb as an independent, perfect incubator cares for the baby in the most optimal, loving way.

True love is not a conscious decision, selfish sensation as we consider it in our world. True love is the automatic, doubtless, selfless, altruistic, most perfect fulfilment of the desire of another exactly how that other wants the desires fulfilled. And while from the side of nature’s creating source true love comes by default as a given, for us it is against our inherent nature. Thus we need to build “true love” consciously, above our inherent inclination, reason, sensing that “supernatural state” in a very obvious, sharp manner.

We will not be able to detect this “primordial loving force” per se, as it is, but we can build a device, a detector that can measure changes, changing states by letting this force flow through it, operate within it. We can imagine this as the radio receiver mentioned above, or a perfectly positioned, tuned musical instrument the “wind accidentally plays on”. And we can also imagine it like building the suitable, self-annulled, subservient puppet this puppet master can manipulate, animate effortlessly without the puppet resisting.


The Hidden, Inner, Primordial Program

So in order to progress towards this selfless, altruistic clothing, in order to keep climbing the formidable mountain to reach its peak we have a double difficulty. It is not enough we need to find fuel, inspiration to keep us climbing, always leaving the comfort zone, progressing towards our goal instead of being satisfied with what we have. Beyond that we also need to find a way of exiting our own inherent inclination, to climb above our “normal” logic and reason.

Such “supernatural”, constant climb, just like conquering a real mountain peak is impossible alone, without a mutually supportive, inspiring environment, group. Thus we need a very unique closed circle, with dedicated, fully committed people, all accepting and attacking the same purpose, wanting to reach the same mountain peak.

But even with such a group it would be impossible to reach a goal that is totally against the inherent human nature, that is completely outside, above the instinctive human calculation, reason. We need some “miraculous” help that can provide that extra lift, giving us “wings” to fly beyond our boundaries, beyond our inherent reason.

And that extra, “miraculous” help is actually hidden inside ourselves.

Although our obvious, revealed human inclination is fully self-serving, self-justifying, and our point of view is completely subjective, we also evolved from the natural system which is permeated by the pure, selfless, artistic force we need to reveal. Which means that inside of us, as part of our evolutionary development we still have the primordial, natural program that safeguards each comprising element’s automatic, altruistic integration within the system.

This program like an old software is hidden underneath our current, updated, selfish human operating program. And in the right conditions, within a special laboratory that old program can be reactivated giving people a “dual operating system” experience, consciousness.


Entering The Dark Cloud

The special environment, laboratory for reactivating this inner program is that mutual circle, comprising from people who made their most important goal to reach our human purpose in existence. This purpose is climbing the highest peak of our evolutionary mountain, finding and attaining the source that created all.

They have to develop that unique duality, dual perception, the tense, constant inner, struggle, war within in order to become capable of the special comparative research revealing reality and its creating source. Their selfish, egoistic inherent nature will constantly try to hold them back, obstruct their further progress towards the mountain peak. It will always search for excuses, reasonably, logically explaining to them how dangerous and futile the further climb, progress into that unknown dark cloud, dangerous maintain path is.

And indeed from the “normal”, reasonable point of view their attempts to try giving up on their own selves, leaving the usual egocentric calculations behind, leaping off the safe cliffs of egoistic logic, self-concern is crazy, suicidal. This is why they need the other operating program, their mutually generated, magnified “belief” in the “other way” of selfless, altruistic existence, giving them access to the system of reality without subjective, selfish distortion.

If they do their mutual work properly they can mutually activate that inner program for each other, which projects in front of them, above the dark, dense ego-fuelled clouds the next mountain peak they need to climb into. Although with their normal reason that next peak looks dangerous, impossible to conquer the reactivated, altruistic inner program paints an accessible path they could try negotiating together, mutually helping, pulling and pushing each other.


I Need What Others Have

And here we reach a very interesting paradox. On one hand we try to reach a completely selfless, altruistic, unconditionally loving and caring second inclination, special clothing that would enable us to enter the system is reality, finding its creating source through the similarity of frequencies. On the other hand at the start, before we can awaken, reactivate the primordial, selfless software all we have is our inherent inclination, with its completely self-serving, self-justifying characteristics.

Thus we need such a unique practical method that allows us to use our inherent nature against itself. As the wise men mentioned at the beginning noted, “…envy, jealousy, desire for respect can pull one out of this world…”

As we are inherently self-serving and self-justifying, and proving our own worth, always placing ourselves above everybody and everything else is the single most important notion in our lives, seeing others better, higher, sensing justified envy, jealousy towards others is simply intolerable for our self-esteem.

We are constantly comparing ourselves to others and always want what others have. I cannot be happy with whatever I possess, even if I have much more than my share, even if I have more than my natural necessities, as long as I feel others have more. I am only satisfied, happy when I have more than others and everybody else knows this as a fact.

Our whole modern human society, the marketing industry, the whole constant quantitative growth human paradigm based on “aggregate demand” is built on this human psychology making us modern slaves as a result.


Avoiding Humiliation

Which means if I see others have something I don’t have, if they achieved something I also want to achieve but can’t, I start to sense burning envy towards those others. This envy literally kills me, I can’t tolerate it since this perceived inferiority compared to others crushed, pulverised my self-worth, self-esteem.

Thus I can’t stay idle but have to act.

I can act in two ways, I can either try taking away what others have, obstruct their progress or I have to go beyond my limitations, exit my comfort zone and make “supernatural” efforts in order to catch up with those others.

Thus in this mutual circle, among these unique, pioneer mountaineers a special game is initiated. Although by default they are incapable of any selfless, altruistic love towards each other they still start play-acting, showing off towards the others as if they have already acquired this “supernatural” capability, and through it they can already observe nature’s perfect system from within. At the same time they also constantly magnify, intensify the importance of achieving that altruistic state, that “other dimension” in order to reach their human purpose in existence.

And this double pronged approach, making the goal absolutely desirable, tantalising, more important than anything else in life for one another, while pretending as if they already have reached that goal to a certain extent, ignites and constantly intensifies the “good” envy, jealousy and desire for respect in this environment.

Everything depends on with how much devotion, effort they are building up this exclusive atmosphere for each other. But if they are fully devoted, committed and gain skills in this game they can start to wash, entice, tempt each other out of their comfort zones.


Dual Existence Fueled By Envy

An increasing tension, uncomfortable inner war starts. On one hand their original inclination tries to discredit the projected achievements of the others, the “hysterical”, fake importance they create around their common, committed goal. On the other hand their appearing, intensifying burning envy seeing the others playing, making superhuman effort can’t let them rest as they don’t know, can’t be certain if those others are still playing or they already truly entered that other dimension.

So the person, against its best selfish judgement follows those others, leaving behind comfort zone and “normal reason”. At the same time this tension, inner war, the growing aspiration towards the second, altruistic inclination awakens and reactivates the primordial  altruistic software subside the inherent, current one. And that software starts faintly highlighting in front of them an unlikely road ahead.

Thus while from their inherent point of view, examined through “normal” reason, logic,  through the unsettling envy they enter an unreal space, a vacuum, as if being hung in between heaven and earth, “flying without wings, breathing under water”; with the help of the primordial, natural operating software they enter a path leading to the actual, selfless, altruistic reality of the single creating and governing force of reality.

They start existing, living in two dimensions, in their own inherent one that remains empty, protesting, infinitely worried about the selfless, altruistic path ahead; and in another that is received from the others, through activating the other, primordial inner program, helping them to access another, altruistic frequency besides the original, selfish one.

And that other dimension is facilitated, accessed by the mutual envy they generate within their mutual circle. It is only this envy that keeps them going instead of resting, retreating into their comfort zones or leaving the campaign all together. It is only their mutual game towards one another that keeps the goal tantalisingly desirable, so they simply can’t give up chasing it.


The Wind Playing On The Harp

Since the higher they go the greater the contrast in between the two inclination and the more slippery the path becomes, they can’t help but slip, fall, lose inspiration, even lose consciousness in those breathless heights. Everything depends on how securely, successfully they tied themselves to one another, how much they gave themselves the exposure, sensitivity, opportunity for envy to warm them, keep them going above reason, above “normal” human potential. They have to become like mountaineers tied to each other, or sailors tied to the mast of the common boat, preparing for storm.

And then this growing inner tension, duality, great contrast becomes like strung, tuned strings the creating, governing force can start playing on. Through this duality, living by the two contrasting operating systems they become the instrument that can detect, analyse the life giving force, electricity flowing through them.

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